G.I. Joe

-Konami (1992)


The Joes battle Cobra to the finish... or do they?                    

My Thoughts

Out of the forgotten arcade of time comes G.I. Joe. The first time I saw it, I was a little kid in the Mall of America. I was a rather large G.I. Joe fan at the time, so I went nuts. Those few minutes of game play provided by the measly amount of quarters I had was enough to get me hooked.  Unfortunately, I never saw the game anywhere again. It wasnít until I got MAME32 years later that I was able to finally play the damn thing. Since this arcade game was released late in the history of G.I. Joe and at the tail end of its popularity, it might explain why no one knows of its existence except for a lucky few.

G.I. Joe is a sort of a shooter (but not shooter enough to make it into our Shooter Monkey section) that has up to four Joes running towards their objectives and blasting away everything they can see. The Joe team is represented by Duke, Snake Eyes, Scarlet, and Road Block. Some Japanese programmer that didn't know the show very well probably picked this team, because Duke has got to be one of the most boring Joes ever. Regardless, each character has one type of gun and an alternate missile launcher. I really couldnít tell much of a difference between any of the characters in the way of game play, so it's a matter of just picking your favorite Joe to kill as many dirty Cobra agents as possible.

I always liked the G.I. Joe personalities, but lets face it, Cobra is way cooler than any of those squares. One of the best things about G.I. Joe the arcade game is that it features practically every Cobra vehicle and character that was produced from that particular era of G.I. Joe. Itís awesome to see so many different Cobra bastards as you rampage through their bases. Still, I do kind of miss miss out on most of the Joes and their vehicles even with Cobra being the flashier side of the coin.

The graphics have become pretty dated, but arenít too horrible to look at. Everything is pixilated, and definitely not in 3D, even though you are running in a 3D sort of environment. Thereís a surprising amount of animations for each enemy. For example, if you hit a H.I.S.S. tank enough times it would dump on its side, or you have to knock an Alley Viperís shield out of his hands before you can actually kill him, and even better the B.A.T.s blow into hundreds of pieces. The characters and vehicles arenít the only things you can blow up either. Most of the environments are destructible and its fun to see what you can blow up as your Joe runs to victory.

The biggest flaws with this game, aside from the credibility issue of up to 4 Joeís destroying all of Cobra, is its repetition and its length. You constantly run towards an enemy base blowing up everything in sight. There isnít anything else to do, and the boss battles are all the same as well. The game doesnít get all that tiring though, because before you know it its over.

All in all this game is fun and distracting, but nothing to get too excited about unless you are a G.I. Joe fan. Even then you'll enjoy the game more for nostalgia purposes than anything else. Now I have to find a working Atari  2600 to play my G.I. Joe Cobra Strike cartridge.

Score: 7.0

- Paul

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You like G.I. Joe? Check out the Season 1 Part 1 DVD mini-series review here, and the G.I. Joe the Complete Miniseries review here.


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