Eight Forces

-Tecmo (1994)

 

 

The Story

Tired of living in Fox McCloud’s shadow, the once timid Slippy quits the Star Fox team, grows a dictator's moustache, and scouts the galaxy to form his own team. The first member he finds is the ninja, known only as Ninja. His ninjitsu piloting skills are second to none in his clan. The once powerful Ifrit had long outlived all of his Final Fantasy masters. One day he heard voices from the beyond that said "get to da choppa." Ifrit is now a feared bounty hunter with a red helicopter from the future. The Unicorn of Valhalla’s never ending supply of wine ensures that he is always in a drunken state before a battle (he also hopes to score with the barely legal witch, J). The hideously deformed android, TSD-014, joined the team in hopes of finding his creator... and killing him. 

This brings us to the young witch, J. She joined to help pay her way through spell-casting school, but seems oblivious to the dangers that space wars represent. Slippy discovered the red-rockin’ rooster drinking at a local townie bar, complaining that his wife left him. Since he had nothing to live for he decided why not. The next odd member is a little girl who communicates through a stuffed bear. She hopes her parents will love her and see that she is not just an accident that occurred in the back seat of her Dad’s ’72 Pontiac Catalina. The final and most buff member of the team, Tigron, wants to break into the movie business and hopes this job will get him noticed by a Hollywood agent. Slippy brings these eight dissimilar creatures together and calls the team…Eight Forces! (Begin corny Japanese theme song).

My Thoughts

Eight Forces is so ridiculously hard, even by impossibly hard shooter standards. Only one of the ships actually has a decent enough weapon to take out all the enemy ships that cram the screen. Most of the ships' weapons shoot in any direction except where the enemies are actually located and coming from. You also can’t avoid most of the enemy weapons fast enough thanks to the slow moving ships and grotesque lack of speed power-ups. This tries to be a silly/fun game and fails. Eight Forces is not fun at all. The comical characters in a frustratingly difficult non-comical shooter do not save the game from a bad score.

 

 

Score: 1.5       

-Shawn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For more on red future 'copters check out Ryu Jin, S.S. Mission, and Ashura Blaster.

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