Final Star Force*

-Tecmo (1992)

*This review is best read using the voice of an overly excited anime girl.


"Itís the first episode of Final Star Force, Final Star Force Encounter. On a routine patrol over the city the Final Star Force encounter an enormous space cruiser of unknown configuration terrorizing the city! Buildings are aflame! It's time to bring this guy down! It turns out that the alien vessel belongs to the Borign, a unified league of aliens that want to take over the Earth. With the help of Sato, the Final Star Force weapons expert, the Final Star Force will be able to win with the new pulse laser. Little do they know that the battle has just begun. Go Final Star Force!"


"Itís a Final Star Force emergency! An underwater vessel has been destroying the Earth Forceís submarines and has already obliterated three cities! It must be stopped before it targets anymore! The Final Star Force needs to search hard for the vessel, or more innocents will die! What? That vessel is from the Borign? Itís a good thing Sato has developed a new lighting stream cannon. Alert, Final Star Force! Blast your stream at them with maximum force! Join us next episode, Final Star Force Emergency."


"The Final Star Force is an elite unit of Earthís Unified Space Force that primarily go on special missions that can't be handled by the regular Earth Forces, but now that the Borign War is heating up they need to redirect all their efforts towards fighting the Borign. Oh no, the main orbit lift is under attack! The orbit lift is an essential port for large starships to launch from the Earthís surface. It must not be destroyed! Whatís that transport ship doing there? Wait, thatís not just a transport ship! What!? It transformed!? Go vertical and defend the lift, Final Star Force! Episode three, Final Star Force Orbit Lift."


"Above all, the Final Star Force must protect the Earth from nasty alien attacks. But that doesnít mean the Final Star Force pilots, Kazu and Jun, can't have a little fun! Oh, sorry guys, your fun will have to wait because the Earth has just entered high alert! The Final Star Force take to space as a large Borign cruiser heads toward Earth. The cruiser must be stopped before it reaches the planet and launches a massive assault. Stop that ship, Final Star Force! Next Episode: Final Star Force Above All!"


"Hey faithful viewers! Ever wonder why the music changes whenever the Final Star Force use a different weapon? Well, it's just another one of Sato's crazy designs. He just loves to play with our minds. Episode five, Final Star Force on the Moon. A strange Borign ship has been reported constructing something on the moon. What is it? It looks like it could be some kind of weapon! Final Star Force needs to destroy that construction ship before the Borign's evil plan can begin. Use the graviton bomb guys! Fly to the Moon, Final Star Force!"


"After the destruction of the Borign weapon on the moon the Final Star Force want to take a little time off to relax. Sato refines the capital T thrower and homing missiles. He also makes the electro-bomb more powerful than before! That's great! Just in time too, because the Borign have a counterattack underway! Will Final Star Force be able to stand up against the awesome Borign counterattack? Withstand the assault, Final Star Force! Next time, Final Star Force Counterattack."


"On the next episode, a massive Borign vessel has been seen approaching the Earth. Itís the Borign mother ship! The Final Star Force must enter the vessel to destroy it. The only way in is through a narrow ventilation shaft, and it leads right to the mother shipís hanger! Wait, where have I seen this before... ah, never mind. Use the megaton bomb, guys! Destroy that ship! Speed like the wind through their vulnerable pipe, Final Star Force! Join us in episode seven, Final Star Force Wind Pipe."


"Next time, on a very special Final Star Force. In this episode Kazu thinks that his good friend Commander Kaorin may be working for the Borign. You know, he has been acting a little fishy lately. Is Commander Kaorin planning to blow up the Final Star Force space station? Kazu needs to set his personal feelings aside if he wants to save the planet. Make your decision, Final Star Force! Episode eight, Final Star Force Decision."


"The Final Star Force need to get back to Earth as fast as possible! A Borign planetary bomb is heading right towards the Earth! If that thing hits it will eliminate all life an leave the planet uninhabitable! The bomb is guided by the psychic powers of the Borign leader, Godeath. Hurry Final Star Force! Save us! Stop that bomb, Final Star Force! The next tension filled episode, Final Star Force Home! Home!" [Reviewer's note: If the bomb destroys the Earth there is an alternate ending.]


"The remaining forces of the Borign are making a last ditch attack to take the planet. With the Borign mother ship destroyed, and the planet bomb obliterated the Final Star Force think they have it easy. Not so! Godeath himself leads the assault in his personal living ship! Eeww, that thing is gross! The Final Star Force has their biggest fight ahead of them. Will they succeed in defeating the Borign once and for all? Itís the final episode of Final Star Force, Final Star Force: Final Force."


Score: 6.5


That's way too many times to say Final Star Force in a review. Gah, there went another one!

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